Wednesday, March 17, 2010

2 years later..

Within these 2 years, average 1 month argue 1 time. Why? If i keep in heart, things will not happen?

Since Chinese new year till now, i have been ignored you till now.
i seriously angry and not happy all days. I just hate you.
I always think about how you treat me. Not so bad, but sometimes find it disgusting..
Do you know when you throw me tempered n lie me blindly because of her I started wondering what's relationship between you and her. Though you always say nothing, but delete message every time. But in mind, i feel there's something. So, i don't want to be unfair. I want to leave.

Sometimes, I find myself no pride. Why you can just take me for granted? Though next day i will be fine, but things accumulate i will get burst. I hate myself indeed. Why I don't treat it as nothing? Because i need someone to be pampered, to be cared and loved. So, i don't like being scolded and lied.

when time goes by...I want to love myself rather than unhappy because of my bf not appreciate and not respect me sometimes. I feel bad..i feel failure..When i leave you alone, being cruelty..i really unhappy. I don't wish to see you unhappy because of me. After all things, why should i concern your feeling instead of making myself unhappy? i want you feel me! I want you pay attention on me! I just want to find argument..!!!

I think i shouldn't dating,because i no longer trust you and believe in u. I can not put trust on you.
As i know i not easier involve a relationship because of my personality and thought. To me, love isn't beautiful at all after my first date. Me and you, be friend better than boy friend.

I think i should be alone, then i will happy.. i don't need worry so much. i don't need worry you lie me or not.. i don't need care whether you care me or not..i don't need mind why you throw me tempered.. Actually love isn't right or wrong...though you not caring n like others do..but you really honest & loyal to me.. However, don't know since when i find honest & loyal has gone... how??? i really don't know how...i felt complicated.

My mind is all about u and her. I cant stop thinking about that. Maybe i really afraid you lie me. I rather you be honest and let me figure out both of you are having affair then i will be happier and release..As i say, If you two really like each other, just go ahead. But just let me know ,i will not mind.. I seriously hate people lie, especially you two ! Don't make me feel like both of you acting like nothing, stranger. Actually very close, super close.
i very suffer! Just like my mother suspect my father. My mother caught him SMS a lady. Called her as 'BABE, I WILL FIND WAY TO SOLVE YOUR FINANCIAL PROBLEM.' My father can just open eye wide and lie my mother! I started feeling sick of world. I will not give you a chance to lie me onward. I will not listen even you explain. I just want to be myself. I'm not silly, i want to be real and realistic. I don't wish you are same as other guy or father! Thought every lie is beautiful ! In fact its not. All is my problem. Please, fulfill my wish !

Be friend forever. We can be very good friend instead of bf/gf. Trust me. I don't wish to lose you as a friend, i can lose you as a bf.



















Friday, January 4, 2008

Missing sumone.....


My bb in thai nw..dono wat r they doin there.. Seriously askin myself whether wan him to go thai,since i felt insecure? 2day ady two ppl ask me about it..1st ask me tat don u worry?y let him go? Ijz dowan 2 thik n tel myself 2 trust u.. Wat can i said jz tellin her wont 1 la..2nd ask me,y do he go ther? Go prostitute? I ter-question him,if u go a bunch of guy,wat wil u do?he tel me pray..at least it make me fel better..i knw it could b lie..jz don bother anyway..i let u go,bcuz i couldnt stop n dowan argue..bside,dowan make u fel uneasy..u might thik i nv concern ya felin,bt i do..even i worry,i hop u understand as well.,bt nt sayin me thik too much n tok badly..i alwiz try my best 2 do my part.. My wories may make u unhapie,bt hope u wil understand my tot..

Monday, November 12, 2007

Graduation koala bear.


Haha..tis gift by my dear..

Friday, August 17, 2007

My Fruit house


I wit my bf at one utama..

Tuesday, August 14, 2007

Couple Watch..

thanks for ya watch my dear...:) when i know d price of d watch..donno why.. its just like..
ia..so expensive..really wastin money..maybe u tryin to say im priority in ya heart..its juz judge by price..anyway, i know u mean it to me...
i not really like tat watch,but u gift me i felt happie ar...but its expensive ar...d watch juz aint deserve for d price perhaps..lol...

actualy price isnt a matter..as long as u got d heart..know wat i like..its enuff.. even cheap cheap stuff i also fel happie.. if u bought me d ferry wheel..i might b happier than getin this watch..
tats wat i fel...its watch from ya,seem make me fel stress..i really scare i wil disapointe ya,leave u sumday..cuz we wil nv know wat wil happen rite...

love u my dear..

Friday, August 10, 2007

Tuesday, July 31, 2007

LOVE?

no money only have true love..just like u and joyc..
got money have true love..but not as real as u guys..
money,u thought can buy love..well,money just can make one's life happier and enjoyable..
so u have neglect wats love really mean..
i remember u said, love is about when i ned u,u wil be there..love is something u scare people steal it away..
but i would thik,love is reality, love hav to show and act..juz like how much u done on ahjoy when u are in poor condition..

like now,u always thik, money is everything..happier n love are two term u knoww..
wats a are some of d women really want?

actualy thik back wat u had said in d mornin, i really angry on ya..
u said u dowan someday when i want money for urgent matter,u cant make it, then i complain on ya..ia.. i really donno how to put me and u together..